my bufo philosophy

The Sacrement can show you God. The deeper work is learning how to live what you've been shown.

5-MeO/Bufo can open us into an experience beyond the identity we have spent a lifetime believing ourselves to be.

Love. Peace. God. Oneness. Trust.

For a moment, we may experience these states not as ideas, but as something we can actually feel in our bodies. And then we come home.

The ego reforms. Our familiar patterns return. The nervous system remembers what it has practiced for years. And we begin looking at life through the same perspectives that shaped us before the ceremony.

This is where I believe the deeper work begins.

My work with Bufo has become increasingly focused on what I call relational healing; using the sacrament as an opportunity to meet the core wounds and patterns underneath the way we relate to ourselves, other people, God, money, love, safety and life itself.

Because underneath the pattern is often something much older.

I'm not safe. I'm going to be abandoned. There isn't enough. I have to earn love. I can't trust anyone.
I have to do everything myself.

These aren't simply thoughts we can positive-think our way out of and they can become deeply familiar ways of experiencing life.

This is why I work differently

Rather than making the intensity of the experience the goal, I often work with intentionally paced, lower-dose experiences when appropriate. In a private session, we may work in several smaller rounds rather than moving immediately toward one large experience.

This can create space to remain present with what is arising.

What is your body doing? What emotion wants to move? What story has appeared? What part of you is afraid?

What does he/she believe? Instead of immediately trying to transcend the experience, we stay with it.

There may be tears. Anger. Fear. Grief. Movement. Sound. Breath. Memories. Resistance.

We allow what is arising to be witnessed and expressed without rushing to make it spiritual, beautiful or peaceful.

And then we practice something different.

Breath. Presence. Safety. Compassion.

A different relationship with the part of you that has been carrying the wound.

Not bypassing the old story with a new one, but meeting what has been underneath it first.

And then we integrate

To me, the ceremony is not the completion of the work, it's part of a relationship we continue between sessions.

Because eventually you go back to your partner. Your children. Your work. Your bank account. Your clients. Your fears. Your decisions.

Your actual life becomes the integration space.

When the old pattern appears again, can you recognize it? Can you notice what happens in your body?

Can you stay with yourself instead of abandoning yourself? Can you respond differently?

Can you return to the peace, trust and love you experienced, not because the medicine is in your body, but because you are learning how to access those states within yourself?

This is what embodiment means to me

I'm not interested in how many times you've experienced God in ceremony.

I'm interested in whether you can remember God when your life gets hard.

When the money isn't there. When someone leaves. When you're triggered. When you don't know what comes next. When everything in your external reality is inviting you back into the old story.

Can you live what the medicine showed you then?

That is the work I am devoted to. Not using medicine to continually escape the human experience.

Using it, with care and discernment, as one part of a much deeper process of learning how to be fully human while remembering the Divine within you.

The ceremony can show you the consciousness of God. Integration is where we learn to embody it.